I’ve lost my motivation to write.
I sit down in front of a piece of paper for 4 hours. I get comfortable in my seat, rest a pen between my fingers, and stare down at the lines in which I’ll write my thoughts…but nothing comes to mind.
I have so much to say, so many stories to tell, but how do I get all my words down when you were my only motivation to do so?
You were my words. You were the thoughts that spilled through my brain, the ink that leaked onto the pages. You were my hands, guiding the pen across the page.
You made me. You were my motivation to read, the reason behind my smile, the warmth on a cold day, the chills I felt at night. You were my crutch, my reason for getting out of bed every morning.
….You made me into who I was..and now you’re gone.
I’m left as nothing more than an empty shell…confused, lost, unsure of who she is. Where do I go? What am I supposed to do? Who am I? Why should I get out of bed? Why should I eat healthy? Why should I take care of myself?
You made up half of who I was…so with you gone..I’m forced to face myself..and I’m not really sure who I am.